When I had just begun learning about meditation through a 30-Day beginners meditation challenge, I had no understanding of what chakras were and how much power for healing they contained.
As I practiced these meditations, they began introducing each of the 7 main chakras. I didn’t believe in the energetic properties at the time, I simply liked how they brought my attention to different sides of myself. Sides that I was better able to see and heal, through the guided acknowledgement of them.
The Root Chakra
So I began with the Root Chakra. The guide explained where to find it (at the base of the spine), what colour it was (red), and that it was associated with grounding, safety and security. I thought of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and imagined it to be the basic physiological needs of every human.
As she explained its purpose, I reflected on how a few months earlier, I’d shared with my friends and family that I didn’t quite know what was wrong with me. What I did know was that I was constantly anxious, which wasn’t normal for me, and that it had felt like I had been falling for the past two years without ever feeling closer to the ground. This meditation was exactly the thing I didn’t know I needed and I enjoyed every moment of reconnecting with that grounding within myself.
The Sacral Chakra
I had racked up 3 major traumas in the area connecting to the sacral chakra over the past 13 years. Traumas that I wasn’t aware still had such an impact on the way I connected with the world. As I listened to the guide, she explained that the sacral chakra was orange, was situated just beneath the naval, and that it dealt with emotions, sexuality and creativity. So I followed along as it encouraged me to finally face some of the pain that had come up during the period of depression that lead to my exploration of meditation.
It wasn’t easy, but as I did the work, I felt the weight gradually lifting and things beginning to shift. Some weeks later I even found myself dancing again after 8 years, drawing, painting and writing poetry which were all things I’d never done before. There was an unmistakable movement of something happening and it felt completely new.
The Solar Plexus Chakra
It was amusing watching this one come into alignment because I’d always had difficulty setting goals, completing tasks and standing up for myself. I also never had much drive to do anything except escape for as long as I can remember. My schooling days came with their own set of traumas within my friendships. I had developed a pretty low self-esteem for most of my life as a result.
I was listening to the guide as she brought my attention to the location of this yellow energy centre located between the naval and the solar plexus. I focused as she explained that it was connected to our willpower, self-esteem and discipline. I figured I had a lot of work to do here too. So, I did the work and allowed whatever wanted to be seen in that moment, to be seen.
Here I sit, more than a year later, writing this blog, putting my story out there on social media as well as in an upcoming book for the world to have opinions on. The journey continues to expand.
The Heart Chakra
This was the most difficult meditation for me to do. The guide explained that part of balancing the Heart Chakra meant forgiving those who hurt us, forgiving ourselves, loving everyone including ourselves and coming to a place of compassion for all. I laid there listening in horror for 2-minutes, I could go no further, and so briskly rolled over to switched it off. I couldn’t forgive. I wasn’t ready to. It was too painful to even imagine letting go. So I moved onto something else until I was finally ready to face that pain 2 days later.
I located the chakra in my chest and began to envision inhaling a green light into it. This was one of the major turning points for me. The moment the victim becomes the hero. This felt like the first real step toward healing, because I wasn’t floating through the process anymore, I was becoming an active participant in it.
I laid there doing the exercise, crying a river and finally allowing myself to let go of all the weight that had been on my chest for so long.
This was the moment I became my own superhero. It was incredibly empowering.
The Throat Chakra
As I breathed light blue into my throat I reflected on the words of the guide. This was the centre of truth and communication. Not just our ability to speak truth and hear truth, but also our ability to be honest with ourselves. I reflected on how easy it had been to lie to myself and then use my wonderfully creative brain to convince myself of its truth. This moment forced a candid, stripped version of reality, to the surface.
It took me a little while to start using my voice as I had never really shared anything too personal on my social media before. But as the healing progressed, I couldn’t help but spill. It flowed out of me on Instagram, Facebook, even YouTube! I started making videos for other people to listen to. I hadn’t even been able to listen to myself in the past. I had constantly questioned everything that came from my lips, and if I’d felt embarrassed about something it would stick with me for months. Months of sleepless nights. On a few occasions even years! And there I was, putting my words out there for anyone and everyone to listen to and form the own opinions on.
I was moving into a strange feeling of liberation from people’s perceptions and even from the beliefs I had held about myself. I liked this feeling. So, I kept working.
The Brow Chakra
This one is probably the most misunderstood. Being Catholic, my mother associated it with the devil and other scary phenomenon. I had never really given it any thought up until the moment I started practicing balancing it on a more regular basis.
During that first session, while breathing an indigo light between my two eyebrows, the guide introduced basic concepts of intuition, wisdom and seeing beyond illusion. I didn’t really understand what it meant, but I liked the idea of seeing things from what seemed like a clearer perspective. Not from the perspective that I’d seen it from thus far, looking back at all the trouble I was working my way out of. So I kept going.
The Crown Chakra
This one meant liberation from depression and connecting to a part of me that was much bigger than the part that was suffering. I had no idea just how big this part of me was and it wasn’t until a few weeks later that I really got a taste of it. But in that moment, it became more important to complete the 30-days and continue on with the practice since whatever it was doing, was helping.
As the time past and my practice deepened, I could no longer deny the direct effect that meditation was having on my overall well-being. My thoughts were shifting into a more positive space, and with that, the release of the depression over me.
In truth, I would say that if it wasn’t for all of those struggles, I would never have known the liberation that was possible on the other side of them. It brought me to a strange sense of gratitude for them, a love for them, and the thought that I would never want to forget them. They remind me of where I was and where others might also still be. To be gentle with them and especially with myself.
Every moment of this journey brings me deeper into love and gratitude.